Have you ever tried to do it all?

I have, I do, and I probably always will. 

It's not only in my nature; 

it's also in my job 

description--

and yours, too.   

Being a woman requires more stamina, more creativity, and more wisdom than I ever dreamed as a young girl.  And that's not just true for today's busy women. It has always been the case.

We all know the biblical story of Mary and Martha: Jesus visits their home. Martha scurries about making things "just so" while Mary sits at Jesus' feet, soaking up all that he says, relishing being in his presence. Martha, of course, runs out of energy and patience, and finally cannot resist pointing out the situation to Jesus.

As with so many nuggets of biblical wisdom, we are tempted to extrapolate the message from God's word without considering its original purpose or the context of our present day world. We, today, tend to claim Martha's attributes as our own.  You know what I mean - feeling the need to prepare the latest recipes from our favorite magazine and to have our homes glistening, and, yes, even have the napkins match the china and on and on.

Ever feel that no matter how hard you try, it's never enough? Maybe it's time to follow Mary's example: leave the dishes in the sink and sit at Jesus' feet!

The life of a woman today isn't really all that different from that of Mary and Martha in the New Testament. Like Mary, you long to sit at the Lord's feet...but the daily demands of a busy world just won't leave you alone. Like Martha, you love Jesus and really want to serve him...yet you struggle with weariness, resentment, and feelings of inadequacy.

Then comes Jesus, right into the midst of your busy Mary/Martha life---and he extends the same invitation he issued long ago to the two sisters of Bethany. Tenderly he invites you to choose "the better part"---a joyful life of "living-room" intimacy with him that flows naturally into "kitchen service" for him. 

Because much in our culture promotes this "Martha Stewart" approach to life, we are inclined to believe that this is what we must do. Contrastingly, it appears as if Jesus is scolding Martha and praising Mary for her attentiveness to his presence. This being the case, we are almost compelled to affirm Mary's attitude in our attempt to be women after Jesus' own heart. Meanwhile, many of us are also saying secretly to ourselves, 'But, if I just sit around like Mary, nothing will ever get done! Then what?

Let's go back to scripture for the biblical context of the Mary/Martha story. This story from Luke 10:38-42 is immediately preceded by the story of the Good Samaritan in which it is suggested that "listening" without "doing" is an empty exercise. Meanwhile, this story maintains that "doing" without "listening" is equally futile. We are talking about balance!

Is your life as out of balance as mine can sometimes be? Where does balance come from?

I have come to realize that my relationship with God is the basis for maintaining a dynamic balance. That means that I need to be willing to talk to God and let my needs be known, like Martha did. It also means I need to be willing to listen to God in guiding my activities, like Mary did. For most of us the listening part is the more difficult. We need to go deep into our own heritage and regain the forgotten but rich practices of our faith, many of which guide us in how to listen to God. We must remember that God values relationship above all else and created us for relationship.

Just as Jesus gently chided Martha when she came to him with her complaints and acted to bring her back into spiritual balance, he can do the same for us. He reminded her that Mary had chosen the better way to participate with him. What did she do? She simply sat and gave him her undivided attention.

My experience as a Stephen Minister has been a wonderful reminder to me in giving undivided attention to what is important, Listening and Doing “in balance”.   As we are able to be like that, to let go of our concerns, our busyness, fragmentation's of our lives, and just be with God – sit down and Listen to what God has to say - then God overtakes our scattered lives and focuses them once again. Attentiveness is healing, life giving, infusing us with strength that is not our own - but God's.

Part of our Mary/Martha issue as women is in knowing when to say "yes" and when to say "no." Our deepest desire is to say yes to God's purposes for us, but that doesn't mean saying yes to everything that comes our way. Being unable to say no, especially to important causes, sets us up for becoming spiritually dry and undernourished. Our challenge is to say no only as a way of saying yes to God's purpose for us, making wise choices among good options.

One such recent choice for me was deciding whether I would continue in school with all the daily demands of life and home could I keep up this pace.  The key is looking at each situation individually and listening for God's input concerning each request before answering. In so doing, our yes or no answers may remain the same, but our purposes for saying them become clearer.

 

The balance for us, as Christians, is attending to the practical and the spiritual, taking both duty and devotion seriously. For most of us, this is an admitted struggle. As we attend to this meaningfully, we will greet life warmly in an atmosphere of joy and abundance.

All of us whether we are Mary’s or Martha’s--- we can draw closer to our Lord, deepening our devotion, strengthening our service, and doing both with less stress and greater joy if we just try Listening and Doing “in balance.”